I could feel the indignation, the self-righteous anger rising within me as I read the message. Me, ask him for forgiveness? I was the injured party! I wanted to scream and throw the phone across the room. Didn't she know? Yet... 

Yet, there was that still small voice reminding me that my friend wasn't asking from a place to hurt me or even offend me... she was asking from a place of love. God's love. God was pricking my heart in that moment. 

I was reading recently about avocado seeds. I've become fascinated by their germination process. If you've never tried to grow a seed, try it! You take this large pit, dry it out, peel off the first layer of skin, pierce the pit with 3 toothpicks evenly spaced across its mass, and then strategically dangle your homemade ninja star over a glass of water, only getting the bottom of the pit wet - and make sure you are frequently changing out the water.

If you’re like me, at this point you are asking yourself, "How do these trees ever exist in the wild? That's a lot of work!" Just so you know, if you Google it, Google will give you the "no duh" answer of "avocados grow from seeds that germinate in the ground." But that gets you thinking (or at least it did me), why the science experiment mentioned up above? 

There's a whole other message in here about patience... For now, though, we're going to focus on the fact that avocado seeds are stubborn and slow germinators. The toothpicks nick the seed's coat, which in turn hastens germination. 

I am a stubborn and slow germinator - we all are. The same process that I am doing to my avocado seed, God is working on my heart:

Peeling away the first layer of skin. John 15:2 - "Every branch in me that does not bear fruit he takes away, and every branch that does bear fruit he prunes, that it may bear more fruit." Just like the avocado seed, I cannot bear fruit till God removes the layers that will prevent or hinder me to grow.

Piercing with toothpicks. Reminds me of the nails they used to crucify Jesus. It should make our hearts tender and soft to reflect on the sacrifice He made for our sins. God needs our hearts soft. Deuteronomy 30:6 - "And the Lord your God will circumcise your heart and the heart of your offspring, so that you love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul that you may live." Circumcision of the heart is a spiritual transformation. It's surrendering our desires, it's surrendering self, and it's surrendering our sinful ways to embrace God’s desires for our lives, embracing to be more like Jesus, embracing humility. 

The water - Baptism... is a new life in Christ, just like that seed will turn into new life. Acts 2:38 - "And Peter said to them, 'Repent and be baptized every one of you in the name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins, and you will receive the gift of the Holy Spirit.'" I was once asked, "Are you Spirit-filled?" And I'll be honest, I didn't know how to answer that. I've been a Christian my entire life, and that question floored me, because I had never fully surrendered my life to the Spirit. I have been living without the help of the one Jesus specifically sent through His ascension to help me. Which brings me to the last point...

Frequently changing the water. Proverbs 17:3 - "The crucible is for silver, and the furnace is for gold, and the Lord tests hearts." There is a whole process for refining silver, but one of the steps is flotation - a way of agitation to separate the pure silver from any impurities. This process is repeated several times until there are no impurities. Like changing the water for your avocado seed removes any mold that may be growing in your water from threatening the life of your seed. God is refining you, He's agitating your life, He's changing out your water - to help you grow.

I may not have felt like I needed forgiveness... but I needed it for my pride and feeling self-righteous in that situation. I also needed to forgive.